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Sunday, September 26, 2010

Saturday Morning Tea on the Balcony

While Tabs and Peter were at soccer, Mist, Pip and I had a tea party on the balcony. Saturday was absolutely beautiful. We had family pictures taken by the lake (school fund raiser) and a family lunch picnic at the beach.

Mistaya just got back from skating lessons. It was interesting as it was an adult/teen skate and she, being 13, was the only teen. Her class mates were profs from UBCO that Peter recognized and school teachers that Mist recognized--she enjoyed the class none the less.

Calming my racing mind. I am falling into the old trap of worrying about the future and wanting to have my future mapped out to the T. Of course all this ever does is make me doubt my map as anything more than depressing. Planning the future does that to a person--it never looks that great on paper.

So, the Buddhist way: fly by the seat of my pants. I've decided that at each point in my life, I can do nothing more than attempt to juggle all of my career aspirations (painting, writing, teaching) within a path dictated by creating good karma. If at any point of my life, I am attempting to fulfill my goals in a manner that creates "good karma," then that is all I must do. So, no worrying about: what if it I cannot make it happen, what if I am bored, lonely, broke etc. If I am simply present, working hard in the moment to achieve my goals in the areas I deem important (and doing it in a good karmic manner) then all is good.
I feel good flying by the seat of my pants--it requires me to be full on in the moment--open to experiences, open to others. I do it when I travel and I am always a happy traveller.

Tomorrow I attempt the Knox Mnt. Bike. This time, I will not do it at 4 AM. No way! That mistake cost me  an entire week! It screwed up my system and I caught a cold from my girls. Thank G for XStrength Cold FX. That is a life saver. It blew my chest cold right out of my body in 4 days.

I've been watching last season of The Office. I love Michael. He is the best and the worst.

Field trip to an orchard with Pip's preschool class tomorrow.

I've officially put down my novel until I receive my MA. Thus tomorrow is the start of my full on attention to my thesis. I am afraid, I am very afraid. I want to run and hide back in summertime. The fall is so raw, so harsh, cruel even. Fly by the seat of your pants my girl--this will keep me optimistic about life. I like thinking something wondrous is right around the corner.

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2 Comments:

Blogger Sandra said...

So do I!

September 27, 2010 at 4:04 PM  
Blogger Melissa Hart said...

Sometimes I sense that something amazing is on the way--unfortunately I don't have that sense at the moment.

September 27, 2010 at 6:50 PM  

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